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Collective Grief – Round Post

Grief comes in many shapes and sizes and it affects us all.

Last week in the UK, Queen Elizabeth II died after a 70 year reign. The national response to her death from my observation has been mixed. There are those who are deeply mourning the national grief alongside the Royal family for the loss of their 96 year old mother, grandmother and Queen. 

While some believe that she ‘tried’ as she was blessed enough to live on the earth for so long. Others grieve the loss of an era, the loss of a constant public figure. While others felt nothing.

For many it unearthed a national grief. Opening a pandora’s box of emotions affiliated to loss in general. It opened the old wounds of grief that were healing.

As we had a very public reminder that death is real no matter what age. Death is the dark reality that we will all face one day, the knowledge of this in itself is a grief. 

It’s okay to be sad even if you are not sure why and it’s okay not to be sad at all.

When the queen died on the 8th of September 2022 the UK entered a 12 day mourning period. For me what this looked like was grief upon grief. I was saddened that we had lost a Queen and afraid of the unknown of what was to come after. 

It also made me reflect on the fact that death is a debt that we all pay. 

I often wonder what the point of life is if we are just going to die anyway. It makes everything feel pointless. Then I remember a revelation I had deep into my season of grief. This revelation was a direct response to the question I just asked. 

“The point is everything in between”, all the life that we live, people we love and experiences we have before we die. No matter how long or short it is. This helps me to have perspective and embrace and enjoy the life I’ve been given for the season I’ve been given. 

The wounds of the death of a loved one will always leave a scar, one that opens each time we hear of the passing of another person, especially a public figure such as the Queen of England.

It can be surprising when you find yourself grieving for someone you didn’t know personally. 

Here are some posts that we have written that will help you explore the topic of collective grief. 

Grief in the public eye

Coping with collective grief

If you are struggling with a personal or collective grief. Please make sure you reach out and talk to someone. The likelihood is that you are not alone in your feelings. 

Our grief support groups provide crucial tools to help you move through your grieving process, including connecting you with others who experience similar loss. 

If you would like to join our support group, the next step is to fill out the bereavement support group application.

Abimbola Shotade
Abimbola Shotade

Abimbola is passionate about working with families to build resilience. She founded In Every Season, which aims to provide resources for those navigating through life’s various challenging seasons and help them sustain a healthy family dynamic. She also authored My Sisters Are Not Good At Wrestling, a children’s picture book on grief that will provide comfort and hope for children and adults.

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